Brintellix

I figure I might as well put this out there - I was started on a new medication. I know, I know, that's going against what the doc in Boston recommended, but the reasoning makes sense.

At my second appointment with my new pdoc, she recommended that I start Brintellix, a brand new antidepressant. Her reasoning is this: I've been on lithium and lamictal for 2.5 years. I've been on geodon for 7 months. These meds are working well for my hypo manic symptoms - I haven't had hypo mania since I was hospitalized in November. I'm as stable on these meds as I'm going to get. But they're obviously not doing much for my depression since I'm still struggling with it. We need to get something on board to work on that.

She gave me 4 weeks worth of samples and wanted to see me again in 2 weeks. I didn't want to take another med. I was scared of having a horrid reaction to it like I did with the Depakote. And it went against what Dr. Schulman said.

So I didn't take it.

And then my depression was pretty bad for 2 weeks. I was apathetic and anhedonic. I cut. A lot. When I saw my pdoc again last week, she again brought up the Brintellix, saying that I had to decide how depressed I was willing to be. She said it was ultimately my choice, but that she strongly recommended it. And we wouldn't know my reaction unless I tried it.

I was scared. The appointment put me in a foul mood. At home, I discussed everything with hubby who then pointed out how miserable I am and how much I hate life. How I don't find joy in anything.

The following day I started the Brintellix.

Today will be day 7 on it (I take it at night). And I have to say, I think it's working. The past 3 days I've felt better (Saturday, Sunday, Monday). More like myself. More happy. It's been refreshing. Yesterday I was actually a little hypo manic - which was great except for the racing thoughts and later in the evening when I turned into a raging bitch for no apparent reason (which poor hubby took the brunt of). I had energy, I got a lot of shit done, I laughed hysterically. It was mostly good.

Today I'm a bit apathetic, a little down, but every day can't be great.

I'm hoping the Brintellix works without putting me into a full blown hypo manic episode. I see my pdoc on the 27th and will be getting a script for it if it seems to be working. I also hope I can afford this medication - it's brand new and my insurance might not cover it. If that's the case, no Brintellix for me. We'll see.