Sunday, November 18, 2012

Another win . . .

Yes, we'll call today a win. Because most of the day was good. Fairly good mood, no real anger, no real depression. Again, as is the case every day, what I struggled the most with was that nagging feeling of emptiness. Like I'm still a shell going through the motions. Not really sad, not really depressed . . .but not really  happy either. I hate this feeling. At least if I'm depressed I feel. At least if I'm angry I feel. Like this . . .I don't feel much of anything. Everything is muted. Shades of grey, no real color. I don't truly enjoy anything.

If only I could stay in a mild state of hypomania . . .

But, overall, we'll call today a win. I didn't break down, I got stuff done, I didn't explode in a fit of rage. I felt some mild happiness, I had some fun, I watched the Broncos kick the Chargers butts. Again.

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